Ervis

You gotta check this out. Watch the video in the article too. Kinda funny. This was the main story on cnn.com today. Must be a slow news day.

Bush takes Elvis-crazy PM to Graceland

Spotlight

I just wanted to revisit this sequence of pictures sent in an email on 8/9/2005 by Mark Leonhartsberger:

Kick me out of the ballgame...kick me out of...

Bunch o' crap. So anyways, in the 8th inning it started raining. Everyone came down to where the concessions are to keep dry. We look over, and we see the video camera guy getting ready to film some people. So I figure I'll run over and get in on the action. You know, I would kinda like to be on TV too. So I get over there and this person says, "If you're not in the family, you have to leave," and they push me. So I left and walked back to where Ryan, Mark, and Dana are (about 20 ft away). So then I yell at the top of my lungs, "Fuck your family" while the guy is shooting. Well it didn't take the Security crew long to come over. They asked for my ID, as if I was going to give it to them. I just took my piece of pizza and flew down the steps. The guy followed me all the way down. I get outside of the gate and proceed to flip him off and start talking shit. All in a days work my friend, all in a days work. There always has to be some drama with me.

Man on the Loose

There were reports from the Reds stadium Wednesday night of man who was out of control. Bob Windruff, a Cincinnati native from Kenwood, was at the game on Wednesday with his wife and kids. Mr. Windruff reported that in the eighth inning a man holding a beer and wearing an orange "Who Dey" t-shirt and glasses was found harrrassing his family. A camera man had supposedly tried to get a shot of him and his family when this drunken person (who's name is unknown at this time) came up. The cameraman from the Reds stadium said "I was trying to get a clip of this family when this guy came out of nowhere and was yelling obscenities. I can't even mention some of the stuff he said. Luckily for me and the family.......he was quickly escorted from the stadium. The man told me that this wasn't the last time he'll see him. I was truly scared for my life." Well, from 9 News......we are happy to say that the family and cameraman are safe today but the "Who Dey" man is still at large.

If you have any information in regards to the whereabouts of the man pictured below, please contact 9 News at 888-61-9NEWS:

Oh Glorious Day

The NFL is coming......I'm just pumped that football is coming. Can't wait.

TJ: We have to talk Jesse into playing some Fantasy football so we can setup a league together.

WTF?

Top Reds Rewarded
The Reds are giving manager Jerry Narron and general manager Wayne Krivsky contract extensions through the 2008 seasons. Sports Illustrated just cited the Reds for having the best front office in baseball this season.

A day after losing to the worst team in baseball? And again I say WTF?

Barry Larkin Bobbleballs Barbie Doll Day

Check out the friggin line for tickets this morning for the Barry Larkin Bobblenuts collectable. I guarantee more than half aren't even going to the game. Bunch of rednecks thinking they are going to make a fortune selling those things on ebay. The thing is you can only buy 10 tickets at a time. So if you sell 10 of them for $20 apiece, you're only making $150. And thats after you go through all the effort of getting them, putting them on ebay and then shipping them. "Hoowee man I'm gonna sell me some of them thar Barry Larkin dolls there man. Gonna buy the old lady somethin real nice. Like a carton of cigarettes or a heart tattoo with our names in it. Or put a down payment on a brand new doublewide. Gonna get me some tonight man."

So anyway, I get up to the ticket counter, one guy ahead of me. Then I hear, "We're all out of the $5 seats." Just my luck. So I had to throw down on the $12 seats. The Reds aren't even worth paying $12 to see. Oh well. Gotta get my stupid ass doll.

KC Masterpiece

How do you blow a 5-1 lead to the worst fucking team in baseball? The Reds might only be 1.5 games out (pending the outcome of the St. Louis / Cleveland game which the Indians are currently winning), but they fucking suck. Even if by some miracle they hold on to the wild card and get in the playoffs mark my words - they have no chance to do anything if they can't even beat the Royals - at home - scoring 8 runs.

I'm a fan, but damn, you gotta be realistic.

My Hero

http://youtube.com/watch?v=iAY0aLtScus&search=joe%20mikulik

The Standing Eaters

I can't believe these people. Eating while standing up? Are they communists? Even if they aren't, I don't want them in my country. They need to go back to where they came from. I didn't even think it was possible to eat while standing up. What, next I suppose you're going to tell me they sleep while standing too? F-ing freaks. Someone has to put a stop to this.

Deadliest Catch

Deadliest Catch.........the show on the Disovery Channel about Alaska's crab fishermen. More details below:

Forty-foot waves, freezing temperatures, swinging 700-pound crab pots, a nearly 100 percent injury rate ... but also the chance to earn enough money for a family to live on for a year or more, for just a few months' work. Welcome to one of the world's deadliest jobs — that of the Alaskan crab fisherman — and witness it firsthand in an all-new season of the Discovery Channel series Deadliest Catch. http://www.thedeadliestcatch.com/



On the Deadliest Catch, they follow 5 different ships. I think we are in the wrong profession! Check out the results for the different ships:

The Time Bandit: $215,000 worth of Opilio Crab, $12,000 per deckhand.
The Maverick: $234,000 worth of Opilio Crab, $10,500 per deckhand.
The Cornelia Marie: $528,000 worth of Opilio Crab, $26,500 per deckhand.
The Rollo: $370,000 worth of Opilio Crab, $21,000 per deckhand.
The Northwesern: $660,000 worth of Cod Fish and Opilio Crab, $30,000 per deckhand for Opilio, and $15,000 per deckhand for Cod Fish. For a grand total of $45,000 per deckhand.


Each deckhand on The Northwestern made $45,000. We need to buy a boat and become Alaskan king crab fishermen.

Liquor in the Front

Well boys, I think I'm finally starting to make the transition from beer to hard liquor. Of course I won't abandon beer altogether, that would be plain insanity. I bought one of those big jugs (1.75 Liters) of Bacardi last night. And I got some Diet Coke. 0 Carbs, 0 Sugar, and quite tasty if I might add. Maybe I'll be able to lose some of this belly fat. We'll see.

Who wants to party? Bacardi and Cola. They get the job done.

If only I could stick my finger down the crack of that a--.

Squandered

Call me Jean Vandeveld at the British open. Or Greg Norman at the Masters, or hell, Mickleson at this past US Open.

All the golfing talk on the blog got me itching to play, so I went out after work today, trying to beat the storms (which I did). First hole - birdie. Second hole - double bogey. Next two holes, pars. Fifth hole is a par 3 which I double - damn - but still sitting at 22 after 5 holes.

The a switch goes off - my game goes off with it. All the sudden I can't hit anything. Drives OB. Chips fat and short. Balls landing under trees, puts lipping out. I shoot a 31 over the last 4 holes. I had a 9 in the mix. The whole round wasted. I shoot 53. Normally I wouldn't be too upset over a 53, but after a 49 out last time and being 1 over after 4 today - I couldn't help.

I wasn't even mad. I could only feel sadness for watching my self destroy something so beautiful I had created.

On the bright side, I think my game is coming around, if I can string enough good holes during 9. Out of my last 18 hole I've played, I've had 4 pars and a birdie. But I also had a couple 9s.

Damn golf.

Racer

Racer

Folger's Support

This is one of the weirdest commericals I have ever seen (it's a new Folger's commercial):

http://youtube.com/watch?v=GQI2KlAurOg&search=folgers%20commercial

It is freaky but it gives me more ammunition for my no sleep theory. In the commerical they sing the following jingle, "get up and out of bed, you can sleep when you are dead." That is my point exactly. That does support my theory but is still wierd.

Calling off the Protest

Now that I'm a company man, I'm thinking about calling off the protest of the ACN Golf Outing. Let's get a team together boys. TJ, you should come down for this one. Its only $65 (only). The Reds are in town that weekend too. Details below.

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Hi, it’s not too late to register your team for the golf outing. Get your team together reply to this e-mail with the names and stop by my desk to make your payment. Don’t have enough players for a team…No worries just let me know and I’ll be happy to place you on a team or find those extra players to round out your team.

Sharon
From: Jackson, Sharon On Behalf Of Foster, Drew W.Sent: Tuesday, April 18, 2006 11:12 AMSubject: Registration: Cincinnati/Dayton Golf Outing - Saturday, August 19th

It’s time to start assembling your foursomes…the annual Cincinnati/Dayton Accenture Golf Outing is scheduled for Saturday, August 19th at the Indian Ridge Golf Club located near Oxford. All employees are invited to play as well as spouses and guests. We will play in a scramble format and have a shotgun start. The outing will start promptly at 8:00 a.m. and we ask that you arrive to the course by 7:30 a.m.

Explanations for Format:
Individuals should assemble their foursomes. If you don’t have a group, we will be able to place you in a foursome. Our goal in 106 golfers.

The scramble formation is a no-pressure format and should help speed up play. Every member in the foursome will hit off of the tee. The team will select the best shot, and everyone in the foursome will play their second shot from that point. The best second shot is selected and everyone will hit from that position. This continues until the ball is in the hole. There is only one score for the foursome on each hole.

Everyone’s drive must be used at least twice.

Cost:
The costs for the golf outing is $65.00 per person. This cost includes eighteen holes with cart, food and prizes. Payment needs to be made no later than Friday, July 28th (the deadline to RSVP). Accenture personnel will be responsible for payment of any/all guests that participate. Please make your check payable to Drew W. Foster and include all fees in that one check. Please give them to Sharon Jackson as soon as possible. All logistics (i.e., tee times, map, etc.) will be distributed one-two weeks prior to the event.

Here is a list of last year’s BIG Winners:
1st Place Team: Dan Haight, David Ansari, Michael Weinstein, Brad Deaton
Last Place Team: Steve Toms, Mike Kursell, Eric Peters, Scott Haarlamert
Men’s Longest Putt: Marvin Shepherd
Women’s Longest Putt:
Men’s Closest to the Pin Hole #8: Kris Moore
Men’s Closets to the Pin Hole #17: Chris Bowsher
Women’s Closest to the Pin Hole #8: Donna Hayslip
Women’s Closet to the Pin Hole #17: Jaclyn Lass

How Do I Register?
We have provided two choices: Group Registration and Individual Registration. Here are some guidelines for each:

Group Registration – If you wish to register a group of two-four people:
Reply to this message with the names of the people in your group. If your group has non-Accenture players, the person who invited them is responsible to make the check payment for fees. Check payment for fees are due to Sharon Jackson by Friday, July 28th. If you have less than four people, we will complete your foursome for you.

Individual Registration – if you wish to play but do not have a group:
Reply to this message listing your name and number and we will add you to a foursome. Check payments for fees are due to Sharon Jackson by Friday, July 28th.

Cancellation Policy:
In the event you will need to cancel your registration you must contact Sharon Jackson no later than 12 p.m. on Friday, August 4th in order to get a refund on your money. After that time no money will be refunded.

RSVP By: Friday, July 28th

Please contact Sharon Jackson at 513-455-1898 with any questions.

No Sleep Theory Tested

Jesse and I tested the no sleep theory this weekend. I think we got a combined 5-6 hours of sleep this entire weekend. We stayed up till about 5am on both Friday and Sat and went golfing the following morning both days. Fun stuff.

So how would I grade the first successful test of the no sleep theory.......A+. It totally explains the golf game on Sunday. No sleep = great golf. It only makes sense that the no sleep was the reasoning for the game of my life. When I get sleep, I usually play like crap but with no sleep, I play decent.

Is the proof not enough that sleep is just a waste of time. There will be many more tests to come but for now........"Put one on the board for the good guys."

The Stars were Aligned for Golf

Jesse's quote summed up my golf game on Sunday "Chambers.....I think the stars are aligned for you today." Jesse, Chris and I strolled out to Avon Fields for some golf on Sunday. It was the second set of 18 that we played this past weekend. It was a ridiculous round for me. Everything just seemed to fall in place. Even the bad shots were turning out good. I shot a 46 on the front and a 46 on the back to end up with a 92. It was crazy. That was the first time I was able to break 50 in my life....finally.

Player's Club

Rundown of the weekend (a pretty damn good one)

Friday: Went up to Chamber's house and on to a party at Emily's (after Chambers worked until 11pm). Everyone there was pretty drunk when we got there, and they were mostly girls so it was kind of loud and obnoxious. We tried to play asshole but only got through two games before everyone quit. Dana came up and met us there. We went back to Ryan's and played some poker. We also decided it was a good idea to start dipping into the liquor. I think we were drinking Bacardi and Ginger Ale, which was actually really good. Anyway, Dana goes from saying she's not feeling anything to the next minute she's slurring and can't even deal the cards. She went to bed but I was still awake so I decided to take a shot before crashing. I took a shot of J&B (scotch?) and immediately my stomach started revolting. I tried to fight it. I mean it was a valiant effort but I ended up puking for the first time in like five years. Thats when I knew it was time to go to bed. That was at about 5am.

Saturday: Todd calls at 8:20am. We're supposed to meet him in my parking lot at 8:30am and from there drive to Vista Verde for 18 holes o golf. I rush upstairs to see why Chambers isn't up. I start calling his name and suddenly the bathroom door opens. He is laying there in his underwear and looks like he's about to pray to the porcelain god. I decided to leave but then got a call from about five mins later and said he was on his way. How he ever went from looking like death to being ready to play golf all day I'll never know. I guess he got it out of his system so to speak.
Golf was pretty good. It was a beautiful day. Todd, Chris Choy, Chambers, and myself all played pretty evenly for the most part.
I was supposed to go to some MNG Omnimax Greece movie in the afternoon. I was kind of wasted from drinking all night then drinking all day on the golf course. But I decided to go. That was a bad decision. I guess I slept through most of the movie and they had to wake me up at the end. The lights were on and everyone there was all pointing and laughing at me. I think I had been slobbering on myself.
Chambers came over on Saturday night. We went and rented this Winning 11 soccer game. It was the shizzle. We played with Brazil and won the World Cup. We had to put our golf gloves on for the last two games because our thumbs were blistering. I think we finished up around 4:30am.

Sunday: Chambers and I meet Chris at Avon Fields to play another 18. Ryan and Chris had the games of their lives. They both easily shot under 100. I shot a 112. Terrible. Absolutely terrible. Now I know how it feels to be the fat kid who sucks at sports. Anyway, Chambers had a pretty good strategy. He was hitting lower clubs but concentrated on keeping the ball straight. He had some really good chips and putts too. I'll kick his butt next time. Yeah right. We did pick up cards for the Player's Club. Apparently you earn points for any golf played at one of the seven Cincinnati Recreation Commission Golf Courses. Reeves is on there. I don't know why those bastards never said anything about this before. Oh well. I'm a playa now so thats all that matters.

Hyde Park Bang Bang

Decomposed Body Found In Hyde Park Yard
Reported by: Lance Barry
Web produced by: Neil Relyea
Photographed by:
Jeremy Glover, Jason Garrison
First posted: 6/25/2006 11:10:49 PM There's mystery after a young man's decomposing body was found in a Hyde Park backyard Sunday afternoon.

The home is located in the 3400 block of Vista Avenue near O'Bryonville.

This particular section of Hyde Park is known for its affluence, not dead bodies.

But that's exactly what police found.

The big question is, how did the body get there?

9News has learned about the theory that police are going with.

Only 9News cameras were at the crime scene Sunday afternoon, capturing a combination of crime tape and police officers keeping onlookers at bay -- some not even sure of what they were looking at.

"I thought it was like a meth lab at first, at first glance," said Ann Lumb, a Hyde Park resident.

It took the coroner's office hauling away what appears to be Cincinnati's most recent homicide for reality to sink in there.

But life-long resident Ann Lumb says she has a reason to be confused about what she saw.

"This kind of thing doesn't happen in this area too much," said Lumb, "so, I'm feeling a little bit afraid to live here."

Cincinnati police wouldn't comment on-camera about the body, but did say it's that of a black male in his late 20s, found in a state of decomposition by the home owner's garage.

Thea Reis lives across from the home. She says she has a hunch that its proximity to I-71 might have played a part.

"You get people coming through here and you just never know what it is going to bring," Reis told 9News.

9News has learned that Cincinnati police aren't ruling that out either, specifically, that the body may have been dumped there.

With the smell coming from that area on Sunday, it would be hard to believe it could have been there long without someone noticing.

The body had no I.D. and it will take a formal autopsy to determine if the cause of death is indeed homicide, while police look for clues.

Tending to her dogs earlier, Reis says she did see something out of the ordinary just days ago. And she wants police to know.

"I had seen a 4-x-4 black car and another car pulling out of his driveway and I thought it was odd," Reis said. "Nobody ever pulls in the driveway, even his children pull out front."

The house in question is for sale and has been so for the past year, 9News was told.

It's asking price is thought to be around $600,000.

To put things in perspective about just how exclusive a neighborhood it is, the house is likely on the less expensive scale in that market -- so certainly not a neighborhood where you'd expect to find a body.

Stay with WCPO.com and WCPO-TV for updates to this story. Please click "refresh" on your browser to view the most recent version of this story.

If you have any information about this crime, please call Crimestoppers at 513-352-3040. You don't have to give your name and you may be eligible for a reward if your tips lead to an arrest.

Jesse - isn't that pretty close to you? Better get a gun.

Ryan's Old BTS Buddy.

Did you guys see this? I've always wondered why no one's tried this.

Bitten By the Lizard

Booyeah! The Reds finally win a series.

Head Coach

Head Coach.....it's a new EA sports game that just came out. It looks really interesting. Check out the link below (it's a funny commercial for the game):

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=coDtqKasRBQ&search=Head%20Coach

Check out the features for the game here:

http://www.easports.com/nflheadcoach/features.jsp

The Extreme Mentos and Diet Coke Experiment

http://eepybird.com/dcm1.html

US Soccer Team Sucks

Well....I'm done forever. No more soccer for me. I gave it a chance and it failed me. I'm not a big soccer nut but I thought I would watch the US Soccer team vs. Ghana yesterday b/c of the following:

1) If Italy beat Czech Rebublic
2) and US team won

they would be going to the sweet 16 ( or whatever they call it). Italy did their job by beating Czech 2-1. On the other hand, the US team sucked it up. Just watching them play pissed me off. It just didn't seem like they had any urgency. Anways.....they lost to Ghana 2-1. Bitter sweet b/c this was the first World Cup for Ghana. Cool for Ghanians!!!!!!

I just had one general thought about watching soccer on TV. I swear......they fall anytime they get touched in soccer. The guy will barely get hit and the next thing you see is him laying on the ground and rolling around. Then he gets up and is limping. Stop being a pussy. I thinks it just for show half of the time so they can get a yellow card or maybe even a red card for the opposing player but come on. That's ridiculous.

True Fan

If you like puzzles ...

If you're bored at work and like stupid puzzles, go here - http://www.websudoku.com/ it's addictive.

Lover's Quarrel

Oh boy........another good aka drunk night with Jesse and Ryan. I have a great story and I'll keep it short. Jesse and I were playing pool last night at Millions. Me being the dumbass that I am was sitting right next to Jesse's nice full glass of whiskey. One move later and the whiskey was all over the floor. No need to explain but Jesse wasn't too happy with me. He got pissed....I got pissed and we both jetted from the place. We were right in the middle of the pool game with 2 other guys. Great shit. We just let in the middle of the game and didn't say shit to the other guys we were playing (Cockoooo.....Cockoooo).

WARNING....WARNING....WARNING Don't play pool drunk. Rightttttttt!

Hell's Kitchen

If you don't already watch this show, do yourself a favor. Chef Ramsey gets so fired up. He's constantly telling people including the customers to go f themselves. This is my favorite line of the show so far:

Chef Ramsey (to one of the women contestants): Here's my suggestion for you. Go and buy a restaurant with one table in it. If it has any more than that, you're f-ed.

Good Read

Oh snap! I can't wait to memorize this book so I can recite it back at the next Community Meeting. Big Ern will be so proud! They must have spent some big money on these books. Its like an actual text book with pictures and everything. Its either going on my coffee table or in the crapper, I can't decide which.

Skyline vs. Goldstar

I must admit when I first tried the Cincinnati chili, I thought Skyline and Goldstar were the same thing (weird chili, hot dogs or spaghetti, and lots and lots o cheese). Oh how young and foolish I was. Since then, I have educated myself as to which is better, and its obviously Skyline. Stupid me decided I would give Goldstar another shot today. It doesn't come close to Skyline. The only thing I like about Goldstar is you can get the garlic bread. Skyline should steal that from them. Anyways, the next time I'm feeling good and hungry, I'll know what time it is.

A-C-N!

Give me an A! Give me a C! Give me an N! Word, I'm just sitting in my hotel in the Chicago suburbs waiting to learn about the Java kernel in the morning. Fucking sweet. I see the bastards from here beat down the Reds again today. If I see them I'll beat some ass. We should've taken them at George Brett's when we had the chance. I wish I was drunk. I'm out.

Manos de Oro!

Dude, did you guys see the reds got Manos de Oro aka Hands of Gold aka Juan Castro back? Sweet. They need some d.

Pinch!

Haha - this is dumb as hell. Killing lobsters in a pot of water isn't 'inhumane' but the way they're transported is? Give me a break. And give me my lobster!

AUSTIN, Texas — Customers craving fresh crustaceans will have to look beyond Whole Foods Market Inc. (WFMI)after the natural-foods grocery chain decided Thursday to stop selling live lobsters and crabs on the grounds that it's inhumane.

The Austin-based grocer spent seven months studying the sale of live lobsters from ship to supermarket aisle, trying to determine whether the creatures suffer along the way.

In some stores, they experimented with "lobster condos," filling tanks with stacks of large pipes the critters can crawl inside. And they moved the tanks behind seafood counters and away from children's tapping fingers.

Ultimately, Whole Foods management decided to immediately stop selling live lobsters and soft-shell crabs, saying they could not ensure the creatures are treated with respect and compassion.

"We place as much emphasis on the importance of humane treatment and quality of life for all animals as we do on the expectations for quality and flavor," John Mackey, Whole Foods' co-founder and chief executive, said in a statement.

Animal rights activities were thrilled with the decision, not just because of the way lobsters are harvested, shipped and stored but because of the fate that awaits many of them — being dropped alive into a pot of boiling water.

"The ways that lobsters are treated would warrant felony cruelty to animals charges if they were dogs or cats," said Bruce Friedrich, a spokesman for People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals.

In making its decision, Whole Foods pointed to a November report from the European Food Safety Authority Animal Health and Welfare panel that it said concluded all decapod crustaceans, including lobsters and crabs, appear to have some degree of awareness, feel pain and can learn.

But other scientists and seafood industry officials said Thursday that lobsters have such primitive insect-like nervous systems they don't even have brains and can't experience pain the way animals and humans do.

For example, lobsters can shed a claw that's stuck between two rocks and move on like nothing happened, said Diane Cowan, a marine biologist who studies lobster behavior in Maine.

"They certainly have a nervous system and respond to external stimuli, but whether you can call it pain I don't know," Cowan said.

About 183 million pounds of lobster are caught each year in the United States and Canada, and about 25 percent of that is sold live, according to the Lobster Institute at the University of Maine.

"People who want lobster will have lobster," said Bill Adler, executive director of the Massachusetts Lobstermen's Association. "If this particular chain does not want to serve it, people will go elsewhere."

From now on, Whole Foods will only sell frozen raw and cooked lobster products at its more than 180 stores in the United States, Canada and the United Kingdom, said Margaret Wittenberg, vice president of quality standards. And the chain will only deal with suppliers meeting their standards for humane treatment, handling and processing.

Whole Foods leaders will reconsider the decision if they see evidence that it's possible to ensure lobsters and crabs are treated humanely throughout the supply chain, she said.

Reverse Tequila Shot

The Reverse Tequila Shot must be the dumbest shot I have ever heard of. TJ's shots might be nasty but this shot just doesn't make any sense. The shot was brought to our attention last night by its founder Brian Griffin. Here's what the shot entails in order:

1) Snort salt up your nose
2) Squeeze lime in your eye (right or left eye....which ever you prefer)
3) Drink tequila shot

As if the tequila is not bad enough.......your nose is burning and your eye is on fire. Nice job! Whoever created this shot must be a genius.

Drunk Calls are the Best

I swear......drunk phone calls are the best. Not always from the receiving end since you would like to be out there getting drunk but they are still great. They are even better if both parties are drunk. I wish you could record the things that two drunk people say to each other. It probably wouldn't make any sense and would be funny as hell. TJ....sorry bout that last night but we were taking the CBJ shot and thought about ya.

Drunk

You drunk bastards! How were the shots last night? Anyone fake one? What'd you finally decide on shooting?

Go To Bathroom Then Wash

WARNING....WARNING....WARNING! If you go to the bathroom, please make sure to wash your hands. If you have to go #2, I don't mind. I do mind when you go #2 and then don't wash your hands. I mean......come on. You just touched your ass and now you are going to go around all day and infect everything you touch. While you're at it, you might as well pick your nose.

Think about that imagery. You just went to the bathroom.....wiped your butt and picked your nose with the same hand. Nice touch! Like I said, if you go to the bathroom.......please wash!

The Poo Collectors

You ever see those people taking their dog out for a walk, the dog poos, and the person picks it up with a plastic bag? I want to know what they're doing with that poo. Where does that poo go? And what if the dog has diahrrea? Do the poo collectors still pick it up? I need to know what they're doing with that poo. It must be of some value. Perhaps there is a black market for dog doo. I've walked past a few of the poo collectors in the act of collecting the poo. They try to pick it up as soon as possible and avoid eye contact as if they think I'm going to try to steal it. And another thing, why do they almost always use a clear plastic bag? Its like they want people to see their dog's poo. Like they're proud of it. "You think thats a big piece o poo. Look what I got. Mine has a peanut in it." The poo collectors. It baffles me. They must know something I don't. I gotta get some of the action. This could be my big break...

Bring Your Lunch and Save?

In the next weeks, we are going to test the theory that bringing your lunch actually saves you money. I'm going to do an experiment to put this theory to the test. This could revolutionize the world. Not really, but it could save you a buck or two.

Slothlisberger

"Baby Ruth!" Sorry, I just had to share this. This is going to turn into a Big Ben/Steelers bashing page, especially since TJ is a little punk and doesn't contribute anything. I propose we rename this blog the JR. Or the RJ. Or the ACN4Lifers.

How's it going to be?

When you walk past someone and they say "How's it going?" Do you they really care how you are doing or are they just saying it to be nice. I make the point b/c people usually don't even wait for a response. I guess it is better then saying nothing but it's still funny.

This is the typical "How's it going" walk by:

Ryan: How's it going?
Anonymous Person: Good.....and you?
Ryan: Great

That's not a very meaningful conversation. If I would have said......I'm having a shitty day then they would have just kept walking. It begs to question. Does the person on the other end of the how's it going really care. Sorry to burst your bubble but I would say there is a high percentage that don't :(

I Heart Work

Believe it or not folks, it is 12:09am EST on Thursday, and I have yet to leave the office. Its fantastic.

The Walk By

It's called the Walk By. Whether you're walking down the street past some stranger or walking in the halfway past a co-worker.......you always have that one moment called the Walk By where you have some decisions to make. Do you say hi, how's it going or walk by in silence? Do you smile, nod your head or just keep your head down?

I personally hate when people walk by and act like noone is there. I mean come on. Hello......atleast say "Hi." We are both human beings. I deserve a hello....right?

It's funny to see the reaction of different strangers on the street when you walk by them and say "Hey". If you haven't tried it yet, you should try it some day. It's fun. The people that pretend not to hear you are the best. I just want to say "I can see you. Can you see me?"

The NBG

I just had to say that the NBG (New Bacon Guy - aka The California Orange Bar up on 5th St.) can cook up one hell of a bacon, egg, and cheese sandwich. Tim Strom and I went there for breakfast today.

Today there is a day game, which equates to everyone but me either working from home or going to the game. Thats garbage. I guess they have to keep someone running on the giant wheel. This place would go to shit without Big Country!

Unredeemable Names

This AIM conversation inspired this blog:

BigCountryJEJ: i do expect people to look a certain way based on their name
RchambersDupont: I know....I hate when you expect something and you get something else
RchambersDupont: Like you hear a girl's name and then you meet the girl and you are like damn.....did you get beat with the ugly stick or what
RchambersDupont: then that name is ruined forever
RchambersDupont: everytime you hear that name you think of that girl
RchambersDupont: sometimes names redeem themselves but not always
RchambersDupont: this conversation is definitely getting a blogspot


Parents.......please make sure you think before naming your kids. Don't ruin all the good names out there. You know the feeling.....right? You hear a name and you think of a certain person or expect someone to look a certain way. Like.....you might hear the name "Mary" and think of blonded girl from high school. On the other hand, you might hear the name David and think of a big dork from elementary. Sorry for all the Davids out there but it's true. You associate certain names with a particular type of person or one specific person.

Some names enter the world of oblivion with no opportunity of a return......also known as unredeemable names. So you might be asking yourself, what the hell am I talking about. Ok.....here's how it begins. Let's us the name Greg for example (this is an example and should not be referenced as real life :) ) . In elementary, you knew a Greg and he was a bully. In high school, there was another Greg and guess what....he was a bully too. Two different guys with the name Greg. I wouldn't totally right this name off but anytime you think of the name Greg you think of a bully.

Example two, you're really excited to meet this new girl in high school. Oh man.....you just can't wait to meet Jenny. She might be the one you are going to marry. You just know it (this is exaggeration by the way). So you are walking down the halfway and one of your friend's points out Jenny and her back is turned. All you can see is her hair. When she turns around, this girl's first impression could put the name immediately into the unredeemable category or spring it right into unforgettable.

It only takes one time and a name could be lost forever.

Got Tickets?

I didn't get out of the office until late last night, almost game time. I was walking down to the parking garage and heard one of the ticket scalpers talking to these young kids. I heard him say, "I ain't tryin' to cheat ya, I'm tryin' to treat ya." I thought that was pretty damn funny. Then I got down to Pete Rose Way, right across from US Bank Arena garage and there were these two white ticket scalpers (which is strange in and of itself). One was saying, "Does anyone have any extra tickets?," and the other one was saying, "Who needs tickets?" They were standing right beside each other. It was the weirdest thing. If one needs tickets and the other is trying to sell them, wouldn't they just talk to each other? F-ing confused my ass. I have no idea how those guys make money anyway. Its always been a mystery to me. Maybe I need to get into the game. Maybe thats my big break...

Toothlessburger

Worthlessburger, Wrecklessburger, Rottencooter, Big Bum, whatever you want to call him was in a serious motorcycle accident today. I can't say I'm happy because I wouldn't wish that on anyone. But I do wonder how much it will affect the Steelers considering the fact that the season starts in a few months. Who knows, maybe Charlie Batch will be lighting it up. Karma man, karma.

Annoying Drivers

Just wanted to get this off my chest. Here are two things that really annoy me when driving. When I'm driving in the fast lane on the highway and I have a car in front of me going a little below or right on the speed limit. Come on.......either get over or speed up. It's not hard.

The other annoyance is when you have the speed racer. This person believes he/she is on the NASCAR circuit fighting for the one spot. For example, you could be going 90 down the highway and have cars in front off you and on your right. They think that since you are not right on the guy's bumper in front of you, they either:

a) get all pissed off and ride your bumper as close as possible
b) try to pass you on the right and cut you off (I love this one the best!) -> This happened to me in Tenn on my way home from a road trip to Columbus, GA

Longest Refresh in the World

I finished up the NewPage BW Prod to QA refresh on Friday night. I started it at the end of April. So I think it was something like one and a half months. It was supposed to take a week. Everything that possibly could go wrong did go wrong. It was complete hell. Oh well. I love my job. ACN for life baby.

Painting in the Rain

On Saturday, it was Paint the Town. Cold rain all day + painting = long day. It was definitely not the best of days to be painting. We didn't get the entire house finished because the paint on the trim kept coming off with the many downpours throughout the day. But all and all it was a good day. I had a good time with Stac, Dana and Jesse at the after party. Corn hole and cheap beer......what could be better! Not to mention that the Jesse & Ryan (J&R) combo on corn hole was undefeated for the night.

No Sleep Theory

You may love to sleep but why do you love to sleep. You probably love to sleep b/c it makes you feel so good when you get a good night sleep.....right? Even I cannot live with out sleep. I guess I would call myself a "Sleep Hater". I hate sleep. I mean....if it didn't make my body feel better to sleep, I won't do it. What a waste of time! I'm basically laying there doing nothing when I could be doing so many other things.

Ok......so what if we didn't need to sleep. Imagine all the things you could get done and accomplish in your life. I'm not talking about work stuff. That's boring. I'm talking about things in your life that you want to do before you die. I want to travel to all 50 states in the US, travel through Europe, check out my heritage in Italy and Ireland, bunge jump, sky dive......the list goes on and on.

Think about it. Say you sleep on average 7 hours per day. So on average you would sleep about 2,555 hours per year. This is about 30% of the total number of hours in a year (Hours of sleep in a year/Total number of hours in year = 2555/8760). Well, I feel like a lazy ass. For about 30% of my year, I am just laying there sleeping. Nice! That's great news.

Let's take a look at sleep over your lifetime. It's very interesting. Average Life Expectancy in the US is around 75 years of age. I think it has gone up but that's a good estimate. When you are 75 years old, you have slept approximately 191,625 hours out of 657,000 in your lifetime which is again about 30%. When you die...hypothetically speaking, you have slept about 30% of your life away.

I know....I know. We need sleep to live. I understand that. But wouldn't it be cool if you could live without sleeping. Look at the things you could accomplish with that 30%. The things you are passionate about...maybe it's hiking or some kind of hobby. I'll have more to come in the future. This is just the beginning.


~ROC

RC's Retirement from Softball is Official

Well.....it's official now. Not sure if he'll go into the Softball Hall of Fame but one thing is certain, this man will go down as a legend in Cincinnati Softball. He might not be graceful but he works hard and gets it done.

But for real.....let's talk a little bit about my game last night. These two situations will sum it up for ya. Our team The Lookouts were down by 2. RC comes up to the plate with 1 out and loaded bases. Swings at the first pitch and pops up to the pitcher. Nice!

So I get one more chance to redeem myself. It's the Top of the 7th and we are down 9-8 with a guy on first and one out. I call my shot like Babe. Unlike the Babe I popped out to the 1st baseman. Game Over. We lose 9-8. Good job RC.

Chad Weis Gone to the Peace Corps

Last night we celebrated the glorious end to a career at Accenture. Another fallen comrade. First there was TJ and then Chad. We had a farewell party at MLTs last night for Chad which was topped off by a Cement Mixer shot. What a terrible shot it is? Lime Juice and Bailey's......the best part is that when you put the two together they curdle in your mouth. It's amazing! If you have never tried one before, don't do it. I told Chad that someone has passed it down to me and he needs to pass it down to someone else. It's only fair.

Again, farewell Chad and good luck with the Peace Corps in Africa. Check out his adventures in Africa at http://www.beesfly.com/main/.

Al-Zardeady

Ryan, Marvin, Brian, and I went golfing Tuesday night. The newly renovated Reeves golf course. The foursome in front of us was slow as hell. They had carts, we were walking, and we were pushing them. Makes no sense to me. Big Marv and I went up to Animations afterwards and played some pool. Yesterday morning was rough to say the least. Shouldn't have taken those tequila shots.

Go Reds! Seven in a row now. First place in the NL Central. Unbelievable.

Ding dong the witch is dead the witch is dead the witch is dead.
Ding dong the evil witch is dead.
Good riddance to Al Zarqawi. That guy sucked ass.

anyone watch the reds last night? i was working, made the work pass a little easier.

You dumbass

Work sux dude. I can't wait to show the new girl my "O" face.

Work

At work and loving it!